Friday, January 7, 2011

A change of plans for the holidays

This year we spent Thanksgiving in Denver with Tony’s family and it was Sam’s first trip to Denver. The trip with the little guy wasn’t too bad since it was only one flight and the time spent with family and friends was great. Sam finally got to meet his uncle Ian and Tony’s best friend, Matt. We had a wonderful time relaxing, catching up and eating some great food! It was pretty chilly and it did snow a little bit, but not enough for Sam to notice, so we won’t call that his first experience with snow. Maybe next time we get back there it will be a little warmer and we can enjoy a hike and do some sight-seeing outside of the city!

For Christmas this year we decided we didn’t want to fly anywhere and deal with holiday/winter air travel and a baby so instead we decided to take a trip up the California coast for a week then spend the rest of the break in San Diego, enjoying the warm weather. That was our plan right up until 2 days before we were supposed to leave. Enter the biggest storms and most rain that the west coast had seen in a long time and flooding up and down the coast; our holiday plans were foiled! We had planned on taking a leisurely drive along the CA 1 and stopping in Santa Barbara, Morro Bay, the Hearst Castle, Big Sur and Monterey on our way to San Francisco, but considering half those towns were underwater, we decided to abort and possibly re-schedule for another date. We wanted to do a couple hikes with Sam and see some of the spectacular views off the coast, but since that would have been impossible; cancelling the trip was probably a good idea. We’ll the try the CA coast trip another time.

So instead, Tony worked for a few more days and we hung out in San Diego until Christmas day. Neither of us really wanted to stay in San Diego for the whole break so we decided to take a short trip out to Joshua Tree National Park, which is about 3 hours east of San Diego. We left on Christmas day and stayed in a really great B&B called Roughly Manor, which was near the entrance of the park, until the 27th. We stopped in the resort-type town called Palm Springs to get some dinner on Christmas since nothing was open near Joshua Tree. Palm Springs is an interesting little town about 2.5 hours east of San Diego and 45mins to an hour from Joshua Tree. The town is supposed to be a “getaway” from L.A. with lots of hotels, spas, restaurants, year-round sun and palm tree-lined streets, but we found it to be a bit of an odd place. I think a lot of old-time celebrities used to hang out there to get away from L.A., and Sonny Bono even used to be its mayor, but now it seems to cater to a weird mix of tourists. Truthfully, I’d rather visit/stay in San Diego any day over Palm Springs but I’m not really a desert person.

Even though I am not usually a big fan of the desert, Joshua Tree National Park is beautiful. We were going to do a long-ish hike on the 26th but it was way too windy to be outside for too long with Sam, so instead we did a bit of a driving tour and got to see the various landscapes of the park. There is a lot of climbing out in Joshua Tree with huge boulders and gigantic piles of rock and cool formations everywhere. It seemed a bit treacherous with such strong winds, but people were still out there climbing. We stayed 2 nights at the B&B and had really delicious breakfasts both mornings, and they even had a high chair for Sam; with all the beautiful Christmas décor, it ended up being a really lovely place to stay around the holidays. On the 27th, we drove back into the park and the weather was a bit nicer (beautiful blue skies and less wind) so we did a short hike in an area called Hidden Valley. It was our first time trying out the new hiking backpack we got for Sam. He seemed to enjoy it enough to conk out for about half the walk/hikes so I guess it will work.

Back in San Diego, it was beautiful and sunny for much of the rest of the break, so we did some nice walks and relaxed a bit with Sam. Tony’s dad came out for a few days to visit and after some initial tears when seeing Grandpa, Sam had a grand time with him for the rest of his stay. So despite our holiday not going quite as planned, it ended up being nice and relaxing and I think Sam really enjoyed having both mom and dad around to spend time with.

For 3 of the past 4 years, Tony and I were always travelling on Christmas (1 trip down to Tassie, 1 to the south Island of New Zealand and 1 to the north Island), so we never really did much in terms of Christmas traditions –especially since we were away from family anyway. We sort of planned for it to be that way again this year since we didn’t think Sam would really understand what was going on, but as things did not go as planned, I was feeling a bit bad about not doing anything “Christmas-y”. We’ll have to figure out what kinds of Christmas traditions we want to share with Sam in the future, but I guess that will start next year…

Sunday, November 21, 2010

Happy ½ year birthday little man

Sam is 6-months old today and we’re still not really sure if this has been the shortest or longest feeling 6-months of our lives but it has definitely been a wonderful ride. As far as stats, Sam doesn’t have his 6-month appt for a couple weeks but we did end up at the Dr’s office on Saturday where they weighed him with his clothes on and he was 19lbs 14oz! Yikes, we have a big kiddo on our hands! He’s pretty tall/long, too, so he’s not really that pudgy; just heavy. Everyone comments how big he looks for a 6-month old, but I think it’s just because I’m carrying him and he looks really big relative to me (Erika).

Sam’s doing all the things that one would expect a 6-month old to do –rolling over, sleeping on his tummy, playing with his feet, bouncing like a crazy man in his jumperoo, putting everything in his mouth, laughing hysterically at silly things, smiling at everyone, and sleeping through the night (up to 12 hours) every once in a while… Sleep seems to be Sam’s biggest nemesis; he fights it with all he’s got but eventually he gives in. Sleep training works for a bit but he constantly needs re-training which is heartbreaking for me every time. Tony makes me go for a run if I don’t have the heart to let him scream it out, which is getting me back in great shape! I think I might actually train for a ½ marathon. 

One thing that we’ve had no problem with is getting Sam to eat. He didn’t care for rice cereal by itself, but as soon as we started giving him fruits and veggies, he was hooked. We haven’t found anything this kid won’t eat. He gobbles down peas, green beans, carrots, sweet potatoes, prunes, squash, applesauce, bananas, peaches, pears… no worries about this kid starving!

Last month we had our first cross-country plane trip with the little guy to visit friends and family on the east coast and the whole trip was a huge success! We flew in to Baltimore where we went apple-picking with friends, then went to Northern VA to stay with other friends and to attend a wedding of a good friend, then we drove down to NC to visit family and more friends. Sam was a super trooper and didn’t cry on any of the 4 planes except when we had to wait on the runway for a while after landing in ATL on our way home. Sam had a wonderful time meeting his great-grandparents in MD and his cousins and Aunt Cheryl and Uncle Scott in NC, as well as lots of friends along the way. Next up is Denver –Tony’s hometown –for Thanksgiving. Since Sam’s an old pro at airplanes and airports, one flight there and back shouldn’t be too bad. There is the possibility that he’ll get to see his first snow as we land in Denver ---BRRRRR!!
Tony and I are finally starting to feel like we are emerging from the haze of having a newborn. I’m still doing stroller strides and I run about 4 days a week –sometime with Sam in the stroller and sometimes at night after he’s asleep –or while he’s screaming in his crib and we’re trying to get him to sleep. Tony joined a local gym and gets there a couple days a week now. We’ve been out to dinner a couple times sans baby while Aunt Sandy has stayed in to watch Sam after he goes to bed. And, we finally got out for a hike on Halloween. We drove up to Julian, which is about an hour east of us, and did a great 4-mile hike on a beautiful fall day. We used the ergo baby carrier, which was OK, but we just got a new hiking backpack that should make things a bit easier and more comfortable for dad and baby.

Sam is growing and changing so quickly. Tony says there are days when he gets home from work and Sam seems older and more grown up than he was just that morning. We put him in a new stroller today and he looked like a handsome little boy rather than our cute little baby.

Friday, August 13, 2010

12 weeks already?!

It is Friday the 13th and Sam is 12 weeks old today. He is almost twice as heavy as he was when he was born and has grown almost 5 inches. He had a Drs. appointment last Friday and he is in the 95th percentile for height/length and 75th for weight. It wasn’t until this past week that we really started to notice just how big our little guy had gotten. While we enjoyed him being such a tiny little guy, we do not miss waking up every 2 hours through the night for feedings. He is now sleeping for a 6-hour stretch at night, which makes us feel much more human and rested.

Last Monday we went up to the beach in Del Mar after work and took a few pictures. It was Sam’s first real trip to the beach and he didn’t seem to mind it too much. He had just discovered his right hand the day before, though, so in most of our pictures he is staring at his hand. He is slowly starting to discover his left hand and his feet as well. It’s incredible how long this can keep him entertained. We don’t usually do much in the evenings after Tony gets home from work because we’ve both been pretty tired, so it was definitely nice to get out of the house with the little guy on a weeknight.

It’s been amazing to watch how quickly Sam has grown and changed in just a few weeks. It was only a little over a year ago when we were trekking around Australia and SE Asia, enraptured by the beautiful sights and breathtaking scenery. Now it’s Sam’s smiles and laughs and watching his amazement with such small things that keeps us entertained and delighted every day. There is, of course, tedium to the days since we are not going out to eat, to movies, bars, etc. but overall, these first 12 weeks hasn’t been so bad. We certainly had our fair share of sleep-deprivation and wondering whether we were doing anything right, but with the first 12 weeks behind us, we are both much more confident parents and are really looking forward to all the different stages that are ahead.

Friday, July 30, 2010

Tony and Erika + 1: Welcome to the world Samuel Joseph Cesare!

Today is exactly 10 weeks since our little guy was born. He was born on Friday, May 21 at Scripps Memorial Hospital in La Jolla, CA. We ended up staying in the hospital for 5 days after a difficult labor then an emergency c-section. In general, the neo-natal nurses were great, but we had one guardian angel in the form of a wonderful nurse named Pat who saw us through the darker days of recovery. Becoming new parents was definitely one of the most eye-opening, exhausting, humbling experiences we’ve ever had. The joy, love and sense of fulfillment didn’t seem to hit until we got back home and were able to enjoy our time to ourselves as a family.

The first few weeks were a whirlwind of diapers, feedings, cuddling and really just getting to know our new little man. It was great to have Tony home from work for 2 weeks so we could start to figure this whole thing out together. We also had lots of family out to visit. The help was definitely welcome and it was a good way for Sam to enter the world –surrounded with lots of people who love him.

Some funny/notable things from the early weeks included a scary night and trip to the children’s hospital emergency room when Sam was only 2 weeks because we were convinced he had diarrhea and was becoming dehydrated. Luckily that Saturday morning at the emergency room was relatively quiet, so after only about 2 hours our fears were allayed and we went home chuckling at ourselves for being those over-sensitive parents but also realizing that the next 18+ years would probably hold many more visits to doctors and emergency rooms. Then, there was Sam’s umbilical cord –it didn’t fall off for 4 weeks! We were convinced we were doing something wrong and we stressed about what terrible parents we were. It finally fell off and we found it under the couch and now Sam has a very cute belly button.

Maintaining balance has been a challenge in the first couple months. After the first couple weeks, we were both saying how easy this whole thing was –but that was when the bub was always asleep and cried very little. Enter reflux and, therefore, parents with little sleep. So, THIS is what everyone was talking about!

Erika started running (okay, really just jogging a bit) at 6 weeks post partum and then started taking a stroller strides class at 7 weeks, which has been a great way to get out of the house with the little one, meet some other moms, and inject a bit of exercise into the routine. The workouts are actually harder than you’d imagine and it’s not always easy to get to them on time with kid in tow, but everyone (all moms) seem to feel much better after the classes. If you have a chance as a new mom –join an exercise class –they really are great!

It’s pretty crazy how much you learn in just 10 weeks. We look back at pictures from the first couple days and weeks and see how small the little guy is. Although we are certainly not experts, I think we are finally starting to get a hang of this whole parenting thing. It’s definitely a pretty big lifestyle change, but the munchkin is so darn lovable that it is certainly worth it. Currently, his big smiles and the beginnings of a laugh just melt our hearts!

And so begins the chronicles of Tony, Erika and Sam…

Sunday, May 9, 2010

Return to blogging: A soon-to-be mom on motherhood

After a long break from blogging, we decided to get back to it. We’re about 2 weeks out from “due date” for the little spudster and we see and feel the little guy’s presence every day. Bringing a little one into the world definitely makes one think about things differently and we’re slowly learning just how differently the world looks through a parent’s eyes.

Today is Mother’s day, and although I am not quite a mother yet, I have been thinking a lot about motherhood and what it means to be a mom. My own mom has certainly set an amazing example for what it means to be not only a truly selfless and wonderful mother, but also a passionate and giving person. Taking my mom’s lessons and adapting them to my own life and the reality of what the world holds today will be my own challenge as I learn how to be the best mother and person that I can be.









So here are just a few questions and thoughts I’ve been reading and thinking about with regard to being a good mom….

1. To circumcise or to not circumcise… and what method is best? If yes, how long after birth should we wait? There seem to be strong arguments on both sides and while a majority of American men are circumcised, most of the rest of the developed world is not. This is not something you can go back on!
2. How long should I breast feed?
3. When’s the best time to go back to work, if ever? Can I feel okay about leaving a 3-month old in daycare? Is it best to go back after 6 months? A year? Is daycare really THAT expensive?
4. What kind of vaccination schedule is most appropriate? I don’t think vaccines cause autism, but is there a better way to spread the vaccinations out during early childhood? Does it matter?
5. How protective do we really need to be? Aren’t germs good to build up a strong immune system?
6. How much interaction should the little one have with other little kids in the first year of life? Is it necessary for social development? What’s the difference between kids who primarily interact with adults in that first year and those who interact with lots of kids regularly?
7. What kinds of chemicals should be kept out of the house? Everything seems to cause cancer these days and I was just reading an article that said that the beginnings of it can be found in the umbilical cord based on mother’s diet and activities during pregnancy!
8. How should I be eating during pregnancy and while breast feeding? Does it make that much of a difference if I’m eating all organic food? Some organic food? Caffeine? Alcohol? Sugar?
9. How much exercise is realistic during pregnancy? After? Can I sign up for a ½ marathon in 3 months? Okay, maybe that’s a little optimistic but I can’t wait to get back to running!!
10. And a final one from a naïve mom-to-be… there are lots of different types of “good moms” out there, but how do you find a balance between being a giving, loving mother and keeping your own identity and sense of self?

Friday, January 22, 2010

An Inspirational Commencement Address from 2009

This is re-posted from Kim and Jason’s blog (http://www.bullcityrunning.com/?page_id=9) because we liked it so much!! Sorry we haven’t posted much lately but we’ll be better about it in the new year –with some fun news and updates. More to come later but for now, take a few minutes to read and think about what kind of difference you can make.

By Paul Hawken

When I was invited to give this speech, I was asked if I could give a simple short talk that was “direct, naked, taut, honest, passionate, lean, shivering, startling, and graceful.” No pressure there.

Let’s begin with the startling part. Class of 2009: you are going to have to figure out what it means to be a human being on earth at a time when every living system is declining, and the rate of decline is accelerating. Kind of a mind-boggling situation… but not one peer-reviewed paper published in the last thirty years can refute that statement. Basically, civilization needs a new operating system, you are the programmers, and we need it within a few decades.

This planet came with a set of instructions, but we seem to have misplaced them. Important rules like don’t poison the water, soil, or air, don’t let the earth get overcrowded, and don’t touch the thermostat have been broken. Buckminster Fuller said that spaceship earth was so ingeniously designed that no one has a clue that we are on one, flying through the universe at a million miles per hour, with no need for seatbelts, lots of room in coach, and really good food—but all that is changing.
There is invisible writing on the back of the diploma you will receive, and in case you didn’t bring lemon juice to decode it, I can tell you what it says: You are Brilliant, and the Earth is Hiring. The earth couldn’t afford to send recruiters or limos to your school. It sent you rain, sunsets, ripe cherries, night blooming jasmine, and that unbelievably cute person you are dating. Take the hint. And here’s the deal: Forget that this task of planet-saving is not possible in the time required. Don’t be put off by people who know what is not possible. Do what needs to be done, and check to see if it was impossible only after you are done.

When asked if I am pessimistic or optimistic about the future, my answer is always the same: If you look at the science about what is happening on earth and aren’t pessimistic, you don’t understand the data. But if you meet the people who are working to restore this earth and the lives of the poor, and you aren’t optimistic, you haven’t got a pulse. What I see everywhere in the world are ordinary people willing to confront despair, power, and incalculable odds in order to restore some semblance of grace, justice, and beauty to this world. The poet Adrienne Rich wrote, “So much has been destroyed I have cast my lot with those who, age after age, perversely, with no extraordinary power, reconstitute the world.” There could be no better description. Humanity is coalescing. It is reconstituting the world, and the action is taking place in schoolrooms, farms, jungles, villages, campuses, companies, refuge camps, deserts, fisheries, and slums.

You join a multitude of caring people. No one knows how many groups and organizations are working on the most salient issues of our day: climate change, poverty, deforestation, peace, water, hunger, conservation, human rights, and more. This is the largest movement the world has ever seen. Rather than control, it seeks connection. Rather than dominance, it strives to disperse concentrations of power. Like Mercy Corps, it works behind the scenes and gets the job done. Large as it is, no one knows the true size of this movement. It provides hope, support, and meaning to billions of people in the world. Its clout resides in idea, not in force. It is made up of teachers, children, peasants, businesspeople, rappers, organic farmers, nuns, artists, government workers, fisherfolk, engineers, students, incorrigible writers, weeping Muslims, concerned mothers, poets, doctors without borders, grieving Christians, street musicians, the President of the United States of America, and as the writer David James Duncan would say, the Creator, the One who loves us all in such a huge way.

There is a rabbinical teaching that says if the world is ending and the Messiah arrives, first plant a tree, and then see if the story is true. Inspiration is not garnered from the litanies of what may befall us; it resides in humanity’s willingness to restore, redress, reform, rebuild, recover, reimagine, and reconsider. “One day you finally knew what you had to do, and began, though the voices around you kept shouting their bad advice,” is Mary Oliver’s description of moving away from the profane toward a deep sense of connectedness to the living world.

Millions of people are working on behalf of strangers, even if the evening news is usually about the death of strangers. This kindness of strangers has religious, even mythic origins, and very specific eighteenth-century roots. Abolitionists were the first people to create a national and global movement to defend the rights of those they did not know. Until that time, no group had filed a grievance except on behalf of itself. The founders of this movement were largely unknown — Granville Clark, Thomas Clarkson, Josiah Wedgwood — and their goal was ridiculous on the face of it: at that time three out of four people in the world were enslaved. Enslaving each other was what human beings had done for ages. And the abolitionist movement was greeted with incredulity. Conservative spokesmen ridiculed the abolitionists as liberals, progressives, do-gooders, meddlers, and activists. They were told they would ruin the economy and drive England into poverty. But for the first time in history a group of people organized themselves to help people they would never know, from whom they would never receive direct or indirect benefit. And today tens of millions of people do this every day. It is called the world of non-profits, civil society, schools, social entrepreneurship, non-governmental organizations, and companies who place social and environmental justice at the top of their strategic goals. The scope and scale of this effort is unparalleled in history.

The living world is not “out there” somewhere, but in your heart. What do we know about life? In the words of biologist Janine Benyus, life creates the conditions that are conducive to life. I can think of no better motto for a future economy. We have tens of thousands of abandoned homes without people and tens of thousands of abandoned people without homes. We have failed bankers advising failed regulators on how to save failed assets. We are the only species on the planet without full employment. Brilliant. We have an economy that tells us that it is cheaper to destroy earth in real time rather than renew, restore, and sustain it. You can print money to bail out a bank but you can’t print life to bail out a planet. At present we are stealing the future, selling it in the present, and calling it gross domestic product. We can just as easily have an economy that is based on healing the future instead of stealing it. We can either create assets for the future or take the assets of the future. One is called restoration and the other exploitation. And whenever we exploit the earth we exploit people and cause untold suffering. Working for the earth is not a way to get rich, it is a way to be rich.

The first living cell came into being nearly 40 million centuries ago, and its direct descendants are in all of our bloodstreams. Literally you are breathing molecules this very second that were inhaled by Moses, Mother Teresa, and Bono. We are vastly interconnected. Our fates are inseparable. We are here because the dream of every cell is to become two cells. And dreams come true. In each of you are one quadrillion cells, 90 percent of which are not human cells. Your body is a community, and without those other microorganisms you would perish in hours. Each human cell has 400 billion molecules conducting millions of processes between trillions of atoms. The total cellular activity in one human body is staggering: one septillion actions at any one moment, a one with twenty-four zeros after it. In a millisecond, our body has undergone ten times more processes than there are stars in the universe, which is exactly what Charles Darwin foretold when he said science would discover that each living creature was a “little universe, formed of a host of self-propagating organisms, inconceivably minute and as numerous as the stars of heaven.”

So I have two questions for you all: First, can you feel your body? Stop for a moment. Feel your body. One septillion activities going on simultaneously, and your body does this so well you are free to ignore it, and wonder instead when this speech will end. You can feel it. It is called life. This is who you are. Second question: who is in charge of your body? Who is managing those molecules? Hopefully not a political party. Life is creating the conditions that are conducive to life inside you, just as in all of nature. Our innate nature is to create the conditions that are conducive to life. What I want you to imagine is that collectively humanity is evincing a deep innate wisdom in coming together to heal the wounds and insults of the past.

Ralph Waldo Emerson once asked what we would do if the stars only came out once every thousand years. No one would sleep that night, of course. The world would create new religions overnight. We would be ecstatic, delirious, made rapturous by the glory of God. Instead, the stars come out every night and we watch television.
This extraordinary time when we are globally aware of each other and the multiple dangers that threaten civilization has never happened, not in a thousand years, not in ten thousand years. Each of us is as complex and beautiful as all the stars in the universe. We have done great things and we have gone way off course in terms of honoring creation. You are graduating to the most amazing, stupefying challenge ever bequested to any generation. The generations before you failed. They didn’t stay up all night. They got distracted and lost sight of the fact that life is a miracle every moment of your existence. Nature beckons you to be on her side. You couldn’t ask for a better boss. The most unrealistic person in the world is the cynic, not the dreamer. Hope only makes sense when it doesn’t make sense to be hopeful. This is your century. Take it and run as if your life depends on it.

Wednesday, October 14, 2009

A Good Day Trip from San Diego


We haven’t done too much exploring since arriving in our new city, so this past weekend we decided to take a day trip to a small town called Julian, which is a little over an hour drive northeast of San Diego. Julian is an old gold mining town and it is known for its apple orchards –and its homemade apple pies –this time of year. The area is also known for having 4 distinct seasons so we thought we might drive out and see if we could experience a bit of the fall weather and the beautiful colors that we miss from the east coast.

We started the day by looking for a short hike and ended up in the Cuyamaca Rancho State Park. Entry fee to park was $8 and an additional $1 for a map of the area. We climbed up to the top of a small peak (an oft-used trail called the Stonewall Peak Trail) and while the views were pretty and you could see out forever, unfortunately the area was recently hit with quite a bit of burning so many trees were black and charred –probably not as pretty as it used to be. Regardless, it was nice to be away from the traffic lights and tall buildings of the city and to enjoy the outdoors while not having to drive too far.

After the hike we made our way to the tiny downtown area of Julian, made up of one main street called “Main Street.” The town of Julian gets pretty busy this time of year so the one main street was crowded and there was a street festival going on. While there were many pie shops along Main Street, the one that had a line running out the door and down the street was called “Moms” –apparently a hometown favorite. While the pies in the window looked delicious, we didn’t care to wait in line for an hour so we made our way to a little crowded corner joint and found a table right by the front window so we could watch the bustling weekenders in Julian. We enjoyed some fabulous buffalo burgers, walked a bit then headed back to town. On the way home we stopped at one of the many apple orchards lining the roads back to SD and we got a big bag of freshly picked apples and pears of all kinds. Now what to do with 10lbs of apples…